Your dreams are not someone else’s to manage. Nobody gets to tell you how big they can be.

Rachel Hollis – Girl, wash your face, 58

It’s January – a new year! Yaaaaaay! and UGH!

Today is the fifth day of January and I already have mixed feelings about this year. I feel like I am on a rollercoaster and on a hamster wheel – a hamster wheel on a rollercoaster? One moment I am feeling cozy and reading a book for the joy of the story, not for research. Fully enjoying “wintering.” The next moment I’m creating a new website to try to start some new career that I can’t really imagine, so it’s hard to get going but I just know I am on the right track, so I spend hours working on it – publish it and see 5 people looked at it and none of them went past the first page. So, was it a waste or was it my first step towards something new? Only time will tell for the future is SO unknown.

Lately, I’ve been anxious. I think that is the best word. I feel excited that the future is unknown and full of possibility, but the unknown is also scary and full of insecurity. My studies taught me to become more observant and see patterns, so I do not allow these feelings to rule me as they once did. Part of how I understand what is going on – because when I get like this – anxious, restless, excited, agitated, and basically at a loss for how to cope, I say ‘what is going on?’ – is to turn to stories for guidance.

I have been bouncing around between myths, trying to figure out how relate myth to myself and to others. I went from painting an octopus, to studying the Kraken, to the Hawaiian god that transformed into an octopus, and finally the octopus-woman that returns to Earth every few generations to have offspring with her offspring. I decided this was not the rabbit hole for me at this particular time. I have been continuing with this pattern all year (all five days of it!!) actually it’s been going on for weeks – I started drawing and painting and then realized I didn’t know what to do with all these paintings and drawings and painting and drawing take a lot of time and I want to learn the guitar again and how to sew and start a new writing project and also do a myth workshop and the list is endless. So, I stopped painting and started writing – why do I write? I do not know – I have like a bazillion things to say about winter, about transitions, and Janus and all these things – it all makes sense in my head – it begins good – but then it starts to split and spread, and I feel myself chasing the ideas – my ability to start is so much stronger than my ability to follow through and finish.

Last year, I finished my dissertation and I completed clearing out and selling my old home. I had two, very major areas of my life end. It was wonderful and liberating to be DONE – I do not have to work on the paper I worked on for more than five years. I do not have to deal with caring for a home I did not live in and things I did not use. I’m DONE – so the big question is – now what? Time to begin – and where better to begin than at the beginning. As a starter, actually finishing these two major milestones left me in a strange state. I like the freedom of not having these things to work on – but don’t really know what to do with myself. I know things to do – I have a million things to do, but what can I do that will be meaningful, that will be helpful, that will give me fulfillment? What makes me happy and how can I do that for employment? What makes me unhappy and how do I stay away from that? There are more questions about the future and the instability of the world makes the questions that much more difficult to answer.

According to the Romans, at the beginning – there was Janus. He was the first god to be invoked in prayers, the first month of the year is named after Janus, and his two faces represent the dual nature of beginnings – because we all know that beginning is exciting AND scary – it’s liberating AND paralyzing. It’s crazy and mixed up, but if we do it right – we can use January to reflect on the past, plan for the future, and be ok with the doorway of right now (the present).

The past does not exist, it is done – it only exists as a story. The future is also a story, we can make plans and can make predictions, but until it happens – it does not exist. Now exists, but it is always gone – now quickly become then. Trying to be in the now – to experience life and not be swept up in what came before an what goes on after is almost impossible – so we have to see now as the threshold of the past and present. Janus the god of thresholds, the god of in between has two faces. He looks both behind and forward. To me – this says reflection and planning. January is frustrating because planning is not doing. Planning is only telling the story of what you want to do. January is exciting because planning is full of possibilities. But does not just look forward with his plans – he also looks back. He reflects – and hopefully learns from the past. I think it is important he has his eye on both. The past without future is death and a future without a past is foolish. January – beginning the new year (ending the old one) is a time to winter, a time to plan, and a time to plan. This is the time the seeds lay dormant – but they are not dead. We can nurture those seeds – feed the ones we want to grow in the spring, summer, and reap in the fall and let those that harm us stay in the winter of the mind for next year’s reflections.

BY STEPHANIE ZAJCHOWSKI

Dr. Marrs’s presentation is called “Reclaiming Medusa: A Look at Otherness in Storytelling”

Reading Greek mythology, we are given the perspective of the gods or mortals that worship them. Chimera, Medusa, Cerberus, the Minotaur – all of these creatures share a common trait – they are “monsters,” and they share a common fate – they are killed by heroes proving themselves to please the gods. The Greeks told the stories honestly, they did not want to insult or displease the gods; it would not occur to them to write the story from the perspective of the Minotaur as it knows it is being hunted by a hero trying to prove himself. His crime was being born different.

Perspective is everything in a story, the words we use to describe our characters create empathy or hatred in the heart of the reader. As an educator, I have watched our nation’s focus on inclusiveness change dramatically in just under twenty years of teaching and even more since I was an elementary student. Where we once understood that history is written by the winners, we now know the importance of including the story of the others, even the “villain.” The more we can understand the villain, the victim, the hero, and the bystander; the more we can understand ourselves, our motives, and strive to be better to others.

In mythology, it is hard to find a perspective as overlooked as the story of the monsters. We have encountered figurative monsters in our lives and some of us have been monsters in our own stories. Working with Medusa and her family has opened my eyes to how much changing the storyteller transforms my understanding of myself and humanity in general. Ladon is not just a serpent, he is Medusa’s tender nephew, her sister’s son. Each being has their own story and perspective.

Changing the roles in the story, making Medusa my hero, has empowered me to change my own story. Before I started working with the gorgon, I thought of the monsters in the myths like the common Greek citizen thought of them – as creatures to be disposed of because they were dangerous. This mindset seems to have carried over into Western civilization’s treatment of “the other” – whether it was another race, another species, or even our own environment. By reclaiming our monsters can we also learn to reclaim some balance – if not in nature, at least in our hearts?

About Dr. Marrs

Professionally, Dr. Tracy Marrs is an educator, a teller of stories, and an inspirer of creativity. Some teachers are known for their great knowledge in their field, others may be known for their ability to manage even the toughest classes; Dr. Tracy is known for loving her students and making them feel seen, heard, and respected. In addition to working in the K12 classroom, she often shares her depth of knowledge and skills in literature with community members by weaving literature and archetypal stories with art and creativity. She excels at distilling esoteric concepts and stories into modern-day understanding and integration. Dr. Marrs has hosted many gatherings for adults in her community interested in art, mythology, and psychology. Her work at the local schools has led her to community-wide creative workshops at the community center and at the schools in her neighboring community. She recently spoke at “The Creative Psyche and Arts-Based Research” Conference in London on the connection between art and critical thinking. She loves her family, her life in the mountains, and their menagerie of animals. She is planning to continue to bring critical thinking, culture, and her unique love of learning to the members of her community and beyond. In her “spare time,” Dr. Marrs has been researching and writing a book based on Medusa and her family. The work was the inspiration for the presentation for our wonderful Mythologuim this year.

To hear Dr. Marrs’s talk and many others, join us at the Mythologium!

The Mythologium is a conference for mythologists and friends of myth. This year’s Mythologium will be held July 28-30 in-person and online in the Pacific time zone.

All times are Pacific Standard Time.

💛 FRIDAY, JULY 28 💛

9:00 – 9:30 Fates & Graces Welcome

9:30 – 10:00 Soul and Circulation
Dr. Amy Lawson and Dr. Robert Scott

10:00 – 10:30 Listening from the Heart of Myth
Amy Beth Katz and Dr. Shane Surrey

10:30 – 10:50 Stretch, Refresh, and Connect Break

10:50 – 11:20 Imagery of the Heart 
Carole Wallencheck and Fatima-Zahra Farahate

11:20 – 11:50 For the Love of Medusa 
Dr. Tracy Marrs and Abigail Nelson

11:50 – 12:00 Fates & Graces Check-in

12:00 – 2:00 Midday Meal and Vocation Fair

2:00 – 2:10 Fates & Graces Welcome Back

2:10 – 2:40 The Heart of the Wild 
Pepa Cartini and Karin Zirk

2:40 – 3:00 Stretch, Refresh, and Connect Break

3:00 – 3:50 Heart Encounters in Liminal Space 
Alyssa Herzinger, Marialuisa Diaz del Leon Zuloaga, Dr. Sunil Parab, and Sheila Spremulli

3:50 – 4:20 Sacred Partnerships of the Heart
Vanessa Valdez and Rick Alexander

4:20 – 5:00 Fates & Graces Closing

Register today!

💛 SATURDAY, JULY 29 💛

All times are Pacific Standard Time. 

9:00 – 9:10 Fates & Graces Welcome

9:10 – 9:50 Myth and the Heart in Movies
Dr. Maggie Mendenhall, Dr. Jody Bower, and Corinne Bourdeau

9:50 – 10:20 Honoring the Heart of the Mother Goddess
Dr. Fujio Mandeville and Helen Slater

10:20 – 10:40 Stretch, Refresh, and Connect Break

10:40 – 11:20 Entering the Heart through Wonder Tales
Dr. Dori Koehler, Laura Lewis-Barr, and Sue Bayliss

11:20 – 11:50 Myth and the Wounded Heart
Kristina Dryža and Michael Maloney

12:00 – 2:00 Midday Meal and Vocation Fair

2:00 – 2:20 Fates & Graces Welcome Back

2:20 – 2:50 Heroine Heart Journeys
Dr. Roxanne Bodsworth and Johanna Fisher

2:50 – 3:10 Stretch, Refresh, and Connect Break

3:10 – 3:40 Hearts Imprisoned, Hearts Liberated
Jennie Wiley and Dr. Maryam Sayyad

3:40 – 4:00 Stretch, Refresh, and Connect Break

4:00 – 5:00 Keynote Speech: Becoming Heart-less: Mythic Metamorphoses and the Posthuman
Dr. Emily Lord-Kambitsch

5:00 – 6:00 Joseph Campbell Foundation Happy Hour!

💛 SUNDAY, JULY 30 💛

All times are Pacific Standard Time. 

9:00 – 9:20 Fates & Graces Welcome

9:20 – 10:00 Centering the Heart
Latonia Dixon, Allison Stieger, and Julie Ciecior

10:00 – 10:20 Stretch, Refresh, and Connect Break

10:20 – 10:50 Integrating the Heart’s Polarities
Rebecca Farrar and Dr. Jean Benedict Raffa

10:50 – 11:30 Sacred Hearts and Hearths
Dr. Darlene Maggie Dowdy, Katie Szymanski, and Dr. Andrea Slominski

11:30 – 12:00 Fates & Graces Farewell